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From: <Johnlebl_at_aol.com>
subject: [Paddlewise] Fwd: Wrongful intent and Cold Canadian Ballast Rocks
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1998 02:34:23 EST
In a message dated 12/30/1998 4:22:50 PM EST, 735769_at_ican.net writes:

<< You get what you pay for. Only Genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks (TM) provide
 the stability one needs in a kayak. Inferior clones will only submerge one
 in a false sense of security.
 
 Sad but true there will always be those who hope to make a buck off the
 uneducated public.
 
 Cheers,
 John Winters >>


Fellow Paddlers,

While it is true that you get what you pay for, who would ever want to use a
genuine Canadian Ballast Rock (TM) in the winter?  They are cold as hell!  

One of the primary, secondary uses for ballast rocks in the first place is to
place into ones sleeping bag to keep them warm at night.  Now think of how
danged cold Genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks (TM) are in winter.

You are much better off buying  Ballast Rocks from the tropics during the
winter no matter how inferior John Winters tries to fool you into believing.

Listen, he is the kind of person that entices you into his sleeping bag in the
winter with the promise of warming you up when in fact he is intent on
stealing every last calorie from your almost hypothermic body.

For the love of all mankind, please!  Buy Tropical Ballast Rocks during the
winter even if the inferior ones from Asia are all you can get.  Your very
life may depend on it!

John LeBlanc


attached mail follows:


Mark wrote;

>      I see that the christmas ballast rock market is being innundated
>with ballast rocks of Asian origions at extremely low prices. I suppose
>that it was only a matter of time.......


You get what you pay for. Only Genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks (TM) provide
the stability one needs in a kayak. Inferior clones will only submerge one
in a false sense of security.

Sad but true there will always be those who hope to make a buck off the
uneducated public.

Cheers,
John Winters
Redwing Designs
Specialists in Human Powered Watercraft
http://home.ican.net/~735769/



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From: John Winters <735769_at_ican.net>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] Fwd: Wrongful intent and Cold Canadian Ballast Rocks
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1998 08:11:19 -0500
John LeBlanc wrote;
>Fellow Paddlers,
>
>While it is true that you get what you pay for, who would ever want to use
a
>genuine Canadian Ballast Rock (TM) in the winter?  They are cold as hell!

Ahhh yes, the voice of ignorance. Those who live in the north and
particularly those of Finnish descent know that Genuine Canadian Ballast
Rocks (TM) hold thier heat better than any other type.
No sauna worth the name would use anything but. Canadians and North
American Indians familiar with the Sweat Lodge and its purifying powers
would never stoop to using inferior young rocks from southern lataitudes
for, only precambrian rocks hold their heat properly and you into tune with
the Earth Mother.

>One of the primary, secondary uses for ballast rocks in the first place is
to
>place into ones sleeping bag to keep them warm at night.  Now think of how
>danged cold Genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks (TM) are in winter.

I wish John had read teh well writtena nd copiuos instructions on the box
wherer they explain trhe best and safest methods of heating your Genuine
Canadian Ballast Rocks (TM) before slipping them into your sleeping bag for
a warm and blissful sleep in -30 degree weather.

(SNIP of chauvanistic comment)

>>Listen, he is the kind of person that entices you into his sleeping bag
in the
>winter with the promise of warming you up when in fact he is intent on
>stealing every last calorie from your almost hypothermic body.

I think you may have confused me with the Southern Redneck Winters family
who sleep with their sisters and cousins. They are not related in any way
to the Canadian Winters family that follows the traditional taboos
regarding incest.

>For the love of all mankind, please!  Buy Tropical Ballast Rocks during
the
>winter even if the inferior ones from Asia are all you can get.  Your very
>life may depend on it!

Indeed, your life may depend upon using only the real thing. By all means
experiment with inferior rocks if you wish but don't blame me for the
results.

Cheers,
John Winters
Redwing Designs
Specialists in Human Powered Watercraft
http://home.ican.net/~735769/

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From: <Johnlebl_at_aol.com>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] Fwd: Wrongful intent and Cold Canadian Ballast Rocks
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1998 14:30:43 EST
In a message dated 12/31/1998 8:12:18 AM EST, BDenton_at_aquagulf.com writes:

<< They are being sold by an Amway type network currently being investigated
by
 the Miami-Dade fraud squad as a possible pyramid scheme.
  >>

Hey !!!!!!!!! No Fair !!!!!!!!!!  I was going to make a mint selling those
things!!!!!!

You rat fink !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Tattletail !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

John LeBlanc

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From: <Johnlebl_at_aol.com>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] Fwd: Wrongful intent and Cold Canadian Ballast Rocks
Date: Thu, 31 Dec 1998 14:48:53 EST
In a message dated 12/31/1998 8:37:23 AM EST, 735769_at_ican.net writes:

<< Indeed, your life may depend upon using only the real thing. By all means
 experiment with inferior rocks if you wish but don't blame me for the
 results.
  >>

As usual, we can all depend on John Winters for some comic drival, especially
in the blissful throes of winter!  I, like most successful entrepreneurs sell
one type Ballast Rock and use another.

Right now, I would have no concept of the use of ballast rocks to keep one
warm.  I simply open the window and let the balmy, warm  air outside permeate
the house.  It is 73 degrees here at high noon.  Oh well, not much help for
the sale of inferior preheated ballast rocks of laval parentage, but it surely
feels good!

John LeBlanc

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