PaddleWise by thread

From: Mark H. Hunt <mhh_at_aretha.jax.org>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] Ancient Maritime Paint Thinners
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 1999 14:57:07 -0500 (EST)
        What is moral turpitude you ask and why is it suddenly in the 
Washington headlines? After a brief internet search I am able to answer 
both of these rhetorical questions. Historically it seems, moral 
turpitude was used by master varnishers of old to clean out their 
badger-hair brushes in the days before turpentine. Although there is some 
debate as to its exact formulation,most agree it contained at least 60% 
oil cold-pressed from Morel mushrooms, 39.5% oil extracted from the 
livers of southern wrong whales and 0.5% toad spit. During the decades 
before it's ultimate demise, there were numerous and widespread protests 
on the part of the whales and toads (not to mention hairless badgers) The 
morel mushroom on the other hand remained strangely silent during this 
dark period. This odd silence on their part is what caused the subject to 
eventually resurface in Washington. In 1988, a 1.9 million dollar grant 
from NIH concluded that, although most responsible plant caregivers talk 
to their plants at least through their formative years, very few people 
bother to talk to fungi. This reprehensible situation was next studied in 
1992 by Vice President Al Gore and the Green Commission on Advancement of 
Fungi. Some of the subjects of this study were quietly transplanted to 
various out-of-the-way corners of the White House rose garden and it was 
here later during the same year that much of the good generated by the 
study was undone when the President's unfortunate discretions with 
several of these fungi were witnessed by 17 secret service agents and the 
White House gardener (many of whom are still in therapy) but this is 
another story altogether and I do not want to wander off topic for this 
list.-  The internet is a wonderful thing!
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From: John Somers <somers_at_utmbrt.utmb.edu>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] Ancient Maritime Paint Thinners
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 1999 17:57:36 -0600
Warning all Paddlewisers:  I have it on good authority that the message
below from "Mark H. Hunt" is a ploy by a demented group of far right-handed
antifungalists.  Don't be surprised if it even contains multiple virii
which could cause untold dissension and disarray among us.
	Moral turpitude and the wonderful internet indeed!



At 02:57 PM 1/25/99 -0500, you wrote:
>        What is moral turpitude you ask and why is it suddenly in the 
>Washington headlines? After a brief internet search I am able to answer 
>both of these rhetorical questions. Historically it seems, moral 
>turpitude was used by master varnishers of old to clean out their 
>badger-hair brushes in the days before turpentine. Although there is some 
>debate as to its exact formulation,most agree it contained at least 60% 
>oil cold-pressed from Morel mushrooms, 39.5% oil extracted from the 
>livers of southern wrong whales and 0.5% toad spit. During the decades 
>before it's ultimate demise, there were numerous and widespread protests 
>on the part of the whales and toads (not to mention hairless badgers) The 
>morel mushroom on the other hand remained strangely silent during this 
>dark period. This odd silence on their part is what caused the subject to 
>eventually resurface in Washington. In 1988, a 1.9 million dollar grant 
>from NIH concluded that, although most responsible plant caregivers talk 
>to their plants at least through their formative years, very few people 
>bother to talk to fungi. This reprehensible situation was next studied in 
>1992 by Vice President Al Gore and the Green Commission on Advancement of 
>Fungi. Some of the subjects of this study were quietly transplanted to 
>various out-of-the-way corners of the White House rose garden and it was 
>here later during the same year that much of the good generated by the 
>study was undone when the President's unfortunate discretions with 
>several of these fungi were witnessed by 17 secret service agents and the 
>White House gardener (many of whom are still in therapy) but this is 
>another story altogether and I do not want to wander off topic for this 
>list.-  The internet is a wonderful thing!


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