Re: [Paddlewise] Receipes for only the strong.

.....as with any complete dining experience, ambiance is very important.   Consider the finest meals you have consumed in your life........what sets them apart in your memory is no doubt the setting in which the repast was consumed.
    Right off the bat, I would not even consider attempting  Kirby's complicated instructions without the appropriate venue.   Nothing but an actual cave will do.  This might take some searching if you live in ..... oh, say, the Florida keys or Georgia sea islands, but the total experience should be well worth the search and therefore the meal should not be attempted without an *actual* cave man  cave.
    Now concerning Kirby's recipe which he has named 'cave man steak'.......  (this is one of the earliest recipes known to man and was formerly known as Mammoth tartar--only the boldest of the Neanderthals would, after first healing from his last attempt, stealthily cover the ground on the verdant Pleistocene savannah towards a mating pair of Mammoths on his stomach......as the mounting Mammoth had other, more sublime delights on his
mind at the moment of the attack, the cave man could with impunity,  actually and successfully exact several mouthfuls of Woolly Mammoth from the flanks, before retreating again as prudence would dictate. The mammoth never missed the protein.)
    Once the cave man cave has been secured, might I suggest continuing the steps towards completing the necessary ambiance by the application of some (cooled) ashes from the fire, and stripping to the waist (or --to the all together for that matter, ---if you choose the more authentic latter option, --just be careful transitioning across the fire while cooking--or the experience might suggest an entirely different name to this type of
cuisine. )
    Keep your conversation with your paddling mate, while you partially incinerate the soft tissues of the large quadruped, (that is, if there are no Woolly Mammoths to be had), to an absolute  minimum or only utter monosyllabic phrases unintelligible to anyone apart from yourself.  Admittedly, this takes some practice to learn to be that incoherent but great help towards this valuable life skill is to be had from listening to the post
race interviews of Nascar drivers.
    A dominance scuffle over the scalding meat with your paddling buddy will no doubt augment the pleasure of the dining experience.  In this case the winner actually loses judging by the blistered and seared soft pallet mouth parts --the 'winner' will doubtless give considerable thought to his conquest for several days following--but it tends detract from the general pain of paddling.....accupuncture principle.
    Or for those in a hurry......the  considerable burden of pain involved in this recipe could be circumvented by simply fast forwarding to the last ingredient of Kirby's enlightened instructions:   The red wine.   Wash down enough gorp with red wine and you won't care that you're only eating gorp.  Once on a short backpacking trip on the AT, I took entirely too much wine and little water........brushing one's teeth with red wine in the
morning cured me of that forever.......but that's another story.
                                                                Happy Jurassic dining paddlemates!
                                                                                    Chris

Kirby Stevens wrote:

> My  best recipe.
>
> Steak on a stick or Caveman Supreme.
>
> First you get a nice juicy steak.   You know the kind that is just dripping with blood.   Get your knife and pierce a hole through both ends of it so a stick can fit through it.   They you place it over the fire and pour gobs barbecue sauce over it making sure every portion of the meat is covered.   Then you wrap up some potatoes in foil and place them around the fire cooking them on  a high heat for at least 20 minutes or until soft.
>
> Now back to the steak, get your knife again and cut off a piece, this is your tester.    If the tester still screams then you need to cook it just a little while longer.
>
> Once everything is ready, open up the foil and put a couple of gobs of sour cream on the potato and start eating.   Leave the steak on the  stick so you can just eat it cave man style.    Once you are finished everything through it in the fire and "VIOLA" no dishes.
>
> I would also like to mention that the red wine is optional though I prefer white myself.
>
> What do you think?
>
> K.Stevens
>
> Coastal Waters Recreation
> Victoria, B.C.
> Website: http://www.islandnet.com/~stevens/home.html
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From:   toki [SMTP:toki_at_islandnet.com]
> Sent:   Sunday, September 05, 1999 9:53 PM
> To:     Paddlewise
> Subject:        [Paddlewise] Receipes for breakfest , lunch or dinner
>
> Hi Just wondering if anyone would like to share their favorite recipe for
> kayaking ?
>
> ***************************************************************************
> PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List
> Submissions:     paddlewise_at_lists.intelenet.net
> Subscriptions:   paddlewise-request_at_lists.intelenet.net
> Website:         http://www.paddlewise.net/
> ***************************************************************************
>
> ***************************************************************************
> PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List
> Submissions:     paddlewise_at_lists.intelenet.net
> Subscriptions:   paddlewise-request_at_lists.intelenet.net
> Website:         http://www.paddlewise.net/
> ***************************************************************************



***************************************************************************
PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List
Submissions:     paddlewise_at_lists.intelenet.net
Subscriptions:   paddlewise-request_at_lists.intelenet.net
Website:         http://www.paddlewise.net/
***************************************************************************