[Paddlewise] Solo or not?

When I was single, I did virtually all my paddling solo, including 
multi-week exposed trips, and it's still my preferred way to kayak, for many 
of the reasons others have articulated.
I'm married now, and I take seriously the idea that I should not cause my 
wife distress. She does worry when I do longer and more challenging trips 
(and there's no point in debating with her whether her fears are rational or 
not - emotions, by their very nature, are not rational, but they are still 
very real).
I still do many shorter and/or less challenging trips alone, but as a 
concession to growing up (which I may do some day inspite of myself) and 
being a mature partner in a relationship, I paddle with one or more other 
people on more difficult trips, since this causes my wife less worry. I find 
the secret is choosing your paddling partner(s) very carefully.
This year's big trip was paddling from Port Hardy around Cape Scott to San 
Josef Bay (for those not familiar with the Pacific Northwest, Cape Scott is 
often talked about in the same terms as Cape Horn. This is propably an 
exageration, but Cape Scott can certainly be wild, and is the site of many 
shipwrecks). While I conceived this trip and did much of the research, the 
woman I paddled with and I paddled as equals. (She's in a parallel situation 
to mine - her life partner, while an active outdoor type, is not keen on 
hard-core paddling trips). She also has solo toured extensively, and is a 
sea kayak guide of many years experience. I found the dynamic on this trip 
to be excellent; we enjoyed each other's company, yet could paddle in 
companionable silence for hours. Neither of us felt we had to baby-sit the 
other, yet we were each confident of the other's ability to assist us should 
we need it (at least in any circumstances where one kayaker could assist 
another!) To ensure I was not taking her thoughts and opinions for granted, 
I was careful ask open-ended questions as we discussed each upcoming day's 
paddling in the light of the radio forecast, the barometer readings, the 
seascape features, and the tidal exchanges; interestingly, we had each 
always reached the same conclusions independently, so there was never a 
tug-of-war over staying or going, or what route to take.
For me it was in many ways the best of both worlds; the increased safety and 
the pleasure of companionship (especially welcome on the beach waiting out 
multi-day storms), and yet plenty of personal space, and without any burden 
of constantly looking after someone else. I'd call it paddling "solo 
together".

Philip Torrens
N49°16' W123°06'

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