Re: [Paddlewise] The Evangelical Paddler's Supply Store

John Winters wrote:

> The Evangelical Paddler's Supply Store
> 
> Ok all you Evangelical Rudderless Paddlers we have it all for you

Wow! Some of this stuff sounds GREAT!! For example:

> Condescending Sneer Mask  with built in radar reflector, Save you the
> trouble of remembering to sneer every time you pass a kayak with a rudder on
> the highway - Just in time for Halloween $12.95 $25.95 for two.

Perfect! I better take two, since I am sometimes accused of being
two-faced. :-) :-)

> 
> Sneaky Rudder. Sneaky rudder mounts under you kayak and can easily be
> slipped on or off when no one is looking. Allows you to reap the benefits of
> a rudder without having to eat crow.
> 
> $115.00

Not interested. I'm too pure for this!

> 
> Crow - In case you get caught attaching Sneaky Rudder,
> 
> $17.98
> 

Not necessary given the above.

> ...<snip>...
> EPSS's stern stickers -  Show your sentiments to one an all. Choose from our
> four transom stickers

Ah, the irony of mounting these on the transom. Absolutely brilliant!
I'll take a half dozen of each of the following:

"Rudders Are A Drag"
"Clean hands, Clean heart, Clean stern"


> ...<snip>...
> EPSS St Christopher statue - For those who haven't yet mastered heeling to
> turn in rough conditions. Our St Christy has been blessed by a BCU coach and
> is guaranteed to protect you from capsize for two months (usually enough to
> learn everything you need to know about handling a boat without a rudder)
> 
> Plastic St Christy $7.95
> IndiGlo St Christy $12.95
> Genuine Inuit hand carved soapstone St Christy $175.00
> 
> All come in an attractive Kevlar gift box.

I don't need no stinkin' St Christy statue--I already know how to
paddle! But then again, the IndiGlo version sounds like it might be
useful at night, and I could probably find a use for that neat kevlar
box. Hmmm... I guess I'll take one. (Quite a steal at only 12.95.)

I assume that the above prices are in Canadian dollars. I have done the
appropriate conversion, and given the current state of the Loony the
total comes to ...... 36 cents U.S.!

My check is in the mail!

Dan Hagen
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