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From: Ricci, Gail <gricci_at_ida.org>
subject: [Paddlewise] FW: How cold is it ...???
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 1999 07:47:59 -0500
  How Cold Is It?

 +60   Californians put on sweaters.

 +50   Miami residents turn on the heat.

 +45   Vermont residents go to outdoor concert.

 +40   You can see your breath.
       Californians shiver uncontrollably.
       Minnesotans go swimming.

 +35   Italian cars don`t start.

 +32   Water freezes.

 +30   You plan your vacation in Australia.

 +25   Ohio water freezes.
       Californians weep pitiably.
       Minnesotans eat ice cream.
       Canadians go swimming.

 +20   Politicians begin to talk about the homeless.
       New York City water freezes.
       Miami residents plan vacation further south.

 +15   French cars don`t start.
       Cat insists on sleeping with you.

 +10   You need jumper cables to get the car going.

 +5    American cars don`t start.

 0     Alaskans put on T-shirts.

 -10   German cars don`t start.
       Eyes freeze shut when you blink.

  -15   You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo.
       Arkansans stick tongues on metal objects.
       Miami residents cease to exist.

 -20   Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you.
       Politicians actually do something about the homeless.
       Minnesotans shovel snow off roof.
       Japanese cars don`t start.

 -25   Too cold to think.
       You need jumper cables to get the driver going.

 -30   You plan a two week hot bath.
       Swedish cars don`t start.

 -40   Californians disappear.
       Minnesotans button top button.
       Canadians put on sweater.
       Your car helps you plan your trip south.

 -50   Congressional hot air freezes.
       Alaskans close the bathroom window.

 -80   Hell freezes over.
       Polar bears move south.
       Green Bay Packer fans order hot cocoa at the game.

 -90   Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.

 -100  Canadian buildings turn off air conditioning.


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