When hell freezes over... Like many paddlers, I hold a particular aversion to jet skis. While I would not go so far as to wish spontaneous combustion of the drivers of such infernal internal combustion devices, I can say that I would have no difficulty with the wretched machines being banned entirely. On the annoyance scale, I place them somewhere between a tent full of mosquitos and a dentist's drill. In short, hell would have to freeze over before I would have anything to do with one of them. Well, you can guess what happened. Break out the crampons and ice axe. I found myself in need of a chase boat for some canoe races. The environmentally responsible and relatively non-offensive put-put I used last year had trouble keeping up with the canoes, so I put out the word that this year I would like something just a little quicker. Enter Bombardier. The outfit which makes the Lear Jet. They know what quick means. They also manufacture the SeaDoo line -- the most popular line of jet skis. They have brought the activity of jet-skiing (I refuse to call it a sport) to more previously quiet waters than anyone else. Enter the devil incartnate dressed in the garb of a multinational corporation. They said, "Richard, we have a SeaDoo for you." They said, "Richard, it has a 210 h.p., six-cylinder Merc." They said, "Richard, it even comes with a CD player just in case things are too quiet." They said, "Richard, you're welcome to it. We'll even through in a couple of chauffeurs. Please, take it. Be our guest. We insist." Well, I caved in. I sacrificed all my values. The universe which I had constructed for myself is now in tatters. I accepted their offer. And here is something which I never in my worst nightmare thought that I would ever say: "Thank you, Bombardier, for your kind support." And you know what is even worse? I really am grateful for their assistance. So hell has frozen over and I have succumbed to the devil's offer. I'll try not to enjoy myself on race day, but I can't make any promises. I suppose I should have anticipated that Bombardier is the devil, and that it knew all along that hell was freezing over, for Bombardier also gave the world SkiDoos. Cheers, Richard Culpeper www.tbaytel.net/culpeper *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - All postings copyright the author and not to be reproduced/forwarded outside PaddleWise without author's permission Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
In a message dated 7/14/00 11:28:45 PM Central Daylight Time, culpeper_at_tbaytel.net writes: > So hell has frozen over and I have succumbed to the devil's offer. > Cheers, > Richard Culpeper I though I felt a chill. Rob (Not an alias) *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - All postings copyright the author and not to be reproduced/forwarded outside PaddleWise without author's permission Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
At 11:41 PM 7/14/00 -0400, Richard Culpeper wrote: > >So hell has frozen over and I have succumbed to the devil's offer. I'll try not to >enjoy myself on race day, but I can't make any promises. I suppose I should have >anticipated that Bombardier is the devil, and that it knew all along that hell was >freezing over, for Bombardier also gave the world SkiDoos. Jet skis aren't all bad. The best wake I've had for wake-surfing my kayak this year came off of a couple of fat girls on a jetski. Must have rode that thing half a mile. -- Wes *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - All postings copyright the author and not to be reproduced/forwarded outside PaddleWise without author's permission Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
Like Richard I have an aversion to jet ski's (they have earned it in the past). However after today I too may have to start rethinking. We had a "Paddlefest" event with 39 kayaks out for a short trip. That may not sound like much for most of you guys, but when you paddlle 4 days a week and see 2 or less other kayaks per week, seeing 39 in one day is a big deal. About 15 of them were first or second time paddlers who took advantage of free loaners from a local kayak rental. We had support from a fire department zodiac, but the group get real spread out. Our additional support came from a jet skier. He did a great job of covering lots of ground to check on paddler's who had wandered off in various directions. He went out of his way to keep from setting up in waves that might disturb the kayakers. Maybe it should be: "jetskis are not obnoxious - people are obnoxious". Then again they are loud and smelly no matter how nice the driver is. Mark J. Arnold conficted in Corpus Christi, Tx. *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - All postings copyright the author and not to be reproduced/forwarded outside PaddleWise without author's permission Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
At 11:41 PM 7/14/00 -0400, Richard Culpeper wrote: >When hell freezes over... > >So hell has frozen over and I have succumbed to the devil's offer. I'll try not to >enjoy myself on race day, but I can't make any promises. I suppose I should have >anticipated that Bombardier is the devil, and that it knew all along that hell was >freezing over, for Bombardier also gave the world SkiDoos. > >Cheers, >Richard Culpeper >www.tbaytel.net/culpeper > sure am glad to have known you before hell freezes over, just don't have to big of smile on your face when you are on the jetski, in fact act like a JERK after all you will be on a jet ski. Have fun and don't forget to come back to earth. Dana *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - All postings copyright the author and not to be reproduced/forwarded outside PaddleWise without author's permission Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
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