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From: perry chamberlain <kato_at_qnet.com>
subject: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science
Date: Sun, 20 May 2001 10:45:05 -0700
I find that if I tape a large bottle
of Asahi Beer on one blade of my
paddle, and one large bottle of
Mickey's big mouth beer on the other
end, my paddle is much heavier, pulls
through the water poorly,  but,  keeps
beer chilled nicely.
Also ensures more of a commitment to
hang on to the paddle, 'til the end of
the day.

Stay tuned, next study includes Beef
Sticks,  as ear and nose plugs, and
sourdough bread loaves as seat
cushions.

(];-)

--
Perry Chamberlain
Kato_at_qnet.com
Liv'n on de Edge n de Desert
Everyone has someone in their family
who is crazy,
if you don't know who it is, its you!



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From: <gpwecho_at_juno.com>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science
Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 15:13:26 -0500
**tongue in cheek warning**tongue in cheek warning**
Now here's a topic I can relate to.  My take on paddles is only my
personal opinion...so I could be wrong!
I want a paddle that will not "move around".  By that I mean when I leave
my paddle stowed near the boat, HOW does it end up leaning against a tree
near my tent the next morning?  And, WHY upon packing the boat most
mornings do I always have to make one last trip back up to the campsite
to get that rambling paddle?  Also, everytime I use my tightest fitting
neoprene skirt, which is a bit of a wrestle to attach, HOW does my paddle
move "just out of fingertip reach" the very moment the skirt is firmly
attached?  And, at night...HOW does my paddle always manage to tangle and
trip my feet when I leave the tent for a night-time pee?  These are the
type paddle questions I deal with.
A friend has suggested that my paddle has a life of its own, and is
somehow getting even with me for sometimes assigning it such lowly duties
as a tarp or clothes-line support pole, a spider swatter, a camp rake, or
even a snake stick!  This I find hard to accept.  My paddle and I are
friends.  I spend many hours talking to my paddle on our way to somewhere
and back again.  I occasionaly sing songs to my paddle.  Hmmm, maybe
singing lessons would help the situation.  

...adieu, mes amies  ...Peyton (Louisiana)
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From: WhiteRabbit <whiterabbit_at_empowering.com>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science
Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 18:04:45 -0500
But are you truly friends with your paddle?  Do you have other paddles?  Has
it heard you lust after another?  Do you call it names when it when it trips
you in the night.  Do you curse it when it wears blisters on your thumb.  Do
you blame it when you can't keep up?  The paddle is sensitive and is easily
hurt;  it also has a long memory and it will get even.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are
putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it.
     ---Mark Twain

ICQ#111665477
------------------------------------------------------------------
----- Original Message -----
From: <gpwecho_at_juno.com>
To: <PaddleWise_at_paddlewise.net>
Sent: Monday, May 21, 2001 3:13 PM
Subject: Re: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science


> **tongue in cheek warning**tongue in cheek warning**
> Now here's a topic I can relate to.  My take on paddles is only my
> personal opinion...so I could be wrong!
> I want a paddle that will not "move around".  By that I mean when I leave
> my paddle stowed near the boat, HOW does it end up leaning against a tree
> near my tent the next morning?  And, WHY upon packing the boat most
> mornings do I always have to make one last trip back up to the campsite
> to get that rambling paddle?  Also, everytime I use my tightest fitting
> neoprene skirt, which is a bit of a wrestle to attach, HOW does my paddle
> move "just out of fingertip reach" the very moment the skirt is firmly
> attached?  And, at night...HOW does my paddle always manage to tangle and
> trip my feet when I leave the tent for a night-time pee?  These are the
> type paddle questions I deal with.
> A friend has suggested that my paddle has a life of its own, and is
> somehow getting even with me for sometimes assigning it such lowly duties
> as a tarp or clothes-line support pole, a spider swatter, a camp rake, or
> even a snake stick!  This I find hard to accept.  My paddle and I are
> friends.  I spend many hours talking to my paddle on our way to somewhere
> and back again.  I occasionaly sing songs to my paddle.  Hmmm, maybe
> singing lessons would help the situation.
>
> ...adieu, mes amies  ...Peyton (Louisiana)
>
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> PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed
> here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire
> responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author.
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>
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From: <JSpinner_at_aol.com>
subject: Re: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science
Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 19:00:32 EDT
In a message dated 5/21/01 4:30:51 PM, gpwecho_at_juno.com writes:

<< A friend has suggested that my paddle has a life of its own, and is
somehow getting even with me for sometimes assigning it such lowly duties
as a tarp or clothes-line support pole, a spider swatter, a camp rake, or
even a snake stick!  This I find hard to accept.  My paddle and I are
friends.  I spend many hours talking to my paddle on our way to somewhere
and back again.  I occasionally sing songs to my paddle.  Hmmm, maybe
singing lessons would help the situation. >>

My suggestion is to make your own paddle. Then you can carve it to fit your 
needs. Short of such an endeavor, I suggest a paddle leash attached to the 
boat, a tree out of reach of your feet, or like a war pony, to your wrist at 
night so you can keep track of it. Your paddle my feel limited by such 
attachments but I'd think a good song or two would cure that.

Joan
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From: Blaauw, Niels <nblaauw_at_foxboro.com>
subject: RE: [Paddlewise] paddles, beer, true science
Date: Tue, 22 May 2001 04:09:14 -0400
Gpwecho (sorry, I don't see a name) wrote about his "friendship" with his
moving-around-paddle.


Dear Gpwecho,

Sorry I have to do this, but you need a serious reality check. You know the
saying "If a friend defeats me once, shame on him ; if he defeats me twice,
shame on me"? How good is your friendship if that paddle keeps trying to
murder you, by tripping you in the dark or disappearing when you need it
most? With friends like that, you don't need any enemies!

The subject has been discussed before, I think the header of that discussion
was "A paddle gone bad". That's what happened to you: Your paddle has gone
bad! What you need is a paddle-training-class. I looked on the internet, but
couldn't find any. What I did find were a couple of dog-training-classes,
which may be just as well. If you can teach your paddle to SIT, FOLLOW, HEEL
and FETCH, you might be able to teach it commands like "STAY, BRACE, COME
and FLOAT". Don't teach it to sink.

Remember that your needs and the paddles needs may not be the same. You
don't want a friendship with your paddle where every stroke has to be an
endlessly discussed compromise between your needs and his. What you need is
a master-slave relation with the thing. Put on your leather skullcap, take
out your whip and show the bastard! Don't do this with the wife around, she
might get jealous.

Enjoy the training,

Niels.

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