Craig Jungers related: "My wife thinks we have too many boats. Especially kayaks". "She told me last week that I have to open my horizons and find new hobbies." Let's see now. There's running with the bulls in Pamplona. There's bungy jumping in New Zealand. Maybe hang gliding or para-sailing in France. Or climbing 8000 meter peaks with Ed Viesturs. There's snorkling on the Great Barrier Reef. Also viewing great whites from a shark cage. How about telemarking in the Selkirks? Or wildlife photography in Kruger National Park. Maybe lassoing wild mustangs in Wyoming. There's also ice climbing your local waterfall. For the ultimate thrill, you might try bowling, golf, or macrame. But if you really want to play Russian roulette with your life, get a TA-G. (Yes, every chamber contains a bullet.) BRC *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
Dear Craig, Please consider giving your wife a wonderful week at The S.P.A. (The Stepford Paddling Appreciatorium). She will be treated to daily cleansing treatments where her brain will be gently washed to remove all negative thoughts about kayaks, canoes, and paddling gear. We will get her into perfect shape with our conditioning program designed with the assistance of both the Pavlovian Institute and the Skinner Center. Just the sight of a kayak will bring her pleasant sensations and stimulate her maternal instincts resulting in desires to wash it, wax it, 303 the hatch covers. and carefully store it in your living room where it will be warm, dry, and comfortable. Of course this may result in difficulties with letting you take the white-water kayaks out in Class III and IV conditions. We also offer special heated rock massages using genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks which we find not only leave the recipient relaxed, but produces ingrained muscle memory which results in a strong desire to go paddling. Our special seaweed body wraps have an effect similar to the Canadian Ballast Rocks, but tend to produce a strong desire to go sea-kayaking. We do also offer a special program for couples interested in tandem kayaking or canoeing, but it requires at least a 3 month stay to bring about a true state of compatibility. We at the S.P.A. have been diligently working on a program suitable for husbands of female paddlers. However, despite our best efforts, we have not been successful at implementing a program which will get them to stop and ask for directions or get them to remember to put the toilet seat back down. Sincerely, Mark J. Arnold, CPA (certified paddling addict) Executive Director of The S.P.A. > [Original Message] > From: Craig Jungers <crjungers_at_gmail.com> > To: Paddlewise <paddlewise_at_paddlewise.net> > Date: 8/5/2007 15:08:30 > Subject: [Paddlewise] The Wife's Ultimatum > > This has been brewing for a number of years but apparently my recent > aquisition of a Mariner Express was the straw. My wife thinks we have too > many boats. *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
A great idea, but if heated rock massage doesn't get her to change her mind, this one should do the trick! I'd say it would create the ultimate in relaxation. http://tinyurl.com/2ogayh -----Original Message----- Behalf Of Mark Arnold We also offer special heated rock massages using genuine Canadian Ballast Rocks which we find not only leave the recipient relaxed, but produces ingrained muscle memory which results in a strong desire to go paddling. *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
On 8/5/07, Bradford R. Crain <crainb_at_pdx.edu> wrote: > > > But if you really want to play Russian roulette with your life, get a > TA-G. > (Yes, every chamber contains a bullet.) > I thought that particular variety was called "Polish Roulette". :) Craig Jungers Royal City, WA *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
This has been brewing for a number of years but apparently my recent aquisition of a Mariner Express was the straw. My wife thinks we have too many boats. Especially kayaks. She thinks my obsession with floaty things is... well... obsessive. I suppose two sailboats, three dinghies, two jetskis, 3 whitewater kayaks and 3 sea kayaks might be considered "too many" by some; certainly no one on Paddlewise. Anyway, I use almost all of them; or someone does... occasionally. She told me last week that I have to open my horizons and find new hobbies. She thinks she'd be ok with a teen-aged girlfriend and a crack habit... but no more kayaks. At least until I sell some. So I'm thinking about seling hers. VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV Boy, am I fortunate. My wife not only understands the purpose of a quiver of kayaks, each with their intended design, but fully half of the fleet is hers. There is the day boat for sea and the trip boat, the surf boat and the whitewater boat. I mentioned I may be in the mood for a play boat and she rolled her eyes, but understood completely. She sold her play boat and just went with a river runner as we are more bashers than anything. As far as opening other horizons, well, that just requires a new beach to launch from and that's as different a horizon as we can expect. Cheers, Rob G ************************************** Get a sneak peek of the all-new AOL at http://discover.aol.com/memed/aolcom30tour *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
Rcgibbert_at_aol.com wrote: >As far as opening other > horizons, well, that just requires a new beach to launch from and that's as >different a horizon as we can expect. > > Or sticking a sail on it :-) Jackie *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
Rob said: >Boy, am I fortunate. My wife not only understands the purpose of a quiver of >kayaks, each with their intended design, but fully half of the fleet is hers. >There is the day boat for sea and the trip boat, the surf boat and the >whitewater boat. I'm even luckier. Last month when I mentioned to my wife that a local mfg had a killer deal available on three ww boats, she asked me if I would like one. When I said yes, she asked why I hadn't ordered it yet. Of course I know this will cost me in the future. Steve Holtzman Southern California *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
> Craig Jungers related: > > "My wife thinks we have too many boats. Especially kayaks". > "She told me last week that I have to open my horizons and find new hobbies." > > Let's see now. There's running with the bulls in Pamplona. There's bungy > jumping in New Zealand. Maybe hang gliding or para-sailing in France. > Or climbing 8000 meter peaks with Ed Viesturs. There's snorkling on > the Great Barrier Reef. > Also viewing great whites from a shark cage. How about telemarking in the > Selkirks? Or wildlife photography in Kruger National Park. Maybe lassoing > wild mustangs in Wyoming. There's also ice climbing your local waterfall. > For the ultimate thrill, you might try bowling, golf, or macrame. > But if you really want to play Russian roulette with your life, get a TA-G. > (Yes, every chamber contains a bullet.) > > BRC At first reading, I thought you wrote: "How about telemarketing in the Selkirks?" "Hmmm", I said (to myself). "They must be a tough crowd over there in the Selkirks." Then I re-read the sentence. I'm not sure which version I prefer. <grin> -- Darryl *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.4.0 : Thu Aug 21 2025 - 16:33:46 PDT