Some things are so embarrasing that you hope nobody finds out - but then again, when you can laugh at yourself, they are also so funny that you just have to tell someone. That's the situation with this short little tale. Saturday, I was out on the water by 8:30 am, for just a short (4 hours total) paddle about 1/2 way up Plum Tree Island NWR, then turn around and head home. Plum Tree is just off of Poquoson, VA on the lower Cheseapeake Bay. Conditions were good - sunny, temps somewhere around low 80's (guess), just a small breeze, and waves at about 3 feet as the water rolled onto the Poquoson Flats. I'm about 100 yards off shore, paddling along day-dreaming about "this and that", and for some reason my legs start cramping a bit, so I figure I'll just find a nice little landing site, and have a stretch and a little bite to eat. Spotted a nice landing. A little beach not more than 40 feet wide and maybe 15 feet deep, with a bunch of scrub growing all around the edges. Pull in, climb out, stretch, grab my day-bag, and pick a nice little spot to stretch out. Something in the scrub has been squawking ever since I got within 10 feet of the landing, but I have no intention of bothering it, so I just ignore it. I figure it's a duck - sounds like one anyway. Two bites into a sandwich the squawking stops. Good, it doesn't feel threatened anymore. I look over to that general area, and something else catches my attention from the corner of my eye. I turn a bit, and not more than 6 or 7 feet away was a duck just sort of sitting there - staring straight at me - just under the first few limbs of the scrub. I figure it will start squawking any moment, but it doesn't, so I turn and keep eating. Couple minutes later, I look, and it's still there..... just staring at me. I'm thinking - what's with this duck, is it playing head games with me, trying to psych me out or something - QUIT STARRING!!!! It's perfectly still, except for the light ruffling of some loose feathers on it. Now I'm thinking, maybe it wants my sandwich. So, I tear off a piece of bread and toss it over. It lands about a foot in front, but the duck didn't move to get it, nor was it spooked by me tossing something towards it. So, I try again. This time, I Bonk it right square on the head, and no movement. WHAT THE?!?!?!!?!? Is this duck in a coma or something! First thought was that I'd been had by a decoy (hope nobody is watching this). But, decoys are painted. They don't have loose feathers that ruffle in the breeze (do they????). Against my principle, I pick up something heavier than bread - a small stick the thickness of a pencil and about the same length.... toss it over.....lands right on the ducks back. It doesn't move - DAMNED DUCK IS SCREWING WITH ME!!!!! I stand up, move around - it's still there - just starring! But..... not...at.....me.. - at the spot where I was. Gotta be a decoy. I decide to screw my principles about not messing with nature and just go right for it. I get right on top of it, kick a little sand in it's face, reach down, and pick the DAMNED DECOY UP!!!!! Good grief - I've been had by a loose decoy that washed ashore and got stuck in the scrub! But not just any ole decoy. Someone went all out with this one. Most detailed decoy I'd ever seen. This baby wasn't a painted decoy - it had a complete layer of feathers and everything! But, alas, still a decoy. I look around - nobody here - good, I can make my escape. Pack up the boat, and off I go. Leave the decoy behind - don't want any evidence. As I'm shoving off, I'm thinking how glad I was that I had been solo, and had no witnesses. Two hours later, when I reach the takeout, my thoughts had already changed to "I wish someone had been there - it was just too funny not to share!" So there you have it. Next time someone accuses me of being a bird-brain I'll probably just smile, and say "that's right, and I can prove it." Ohhh - the squawking was real. I'm not toally nuts yet, but give me a few more years. Rick - Poquoson, VA (home of the psyco duck) *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
>Some things are so embarrasing that you hope nobody finds out And some definitely need telling. >This time, I Bonk it right square on the head,....... >Good grief - I've been had by a loose decoy that washed ashore .... I was paddling with a friend quite a few years ago and after a portage across a road (!!) we entered the next narrower, tidal stretch. I paddled up to a nearest duck and hit it over the head with my paddle. My friend was quite disturbed by my actions (too much cycling in Buddhist countries?), until she realised the the "duck" was a decoy. I knew it was there (from a previous trip) and got the expected reaction (!!!). Cruel???? :-) A good overnight trip that one, camped under pines (no tent), woke to the sun rising over the mountains. Alex Alex (Sandy) Ferguson Chemistry Department University of Canterbury New Zealand *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
> > I was paddling with a friend quite a few years ago and after a portage > across a road (!!) we entered the next narrower, tidal stretch. I paddled > up to a nearest duck and hit it over the head with my paddle. My friend was > quite disturbed by my actions (too much cycling in Buddhist countries?), > until she realised the the "duck" was a decoy. I knew it was there (from a > previous trip) and got the expected reaction (!!!). > > Cruel???? :-) disturbed perhaps Alex, but not cruel. > > A good overnight trip that one, camped under pines (no tent), woke to the > sun rising over the mountains. camped?...no tent? definitely disturbed. Just getting into winter down there, eh? hope all is very well, gabriel -- Ī Gabriel L Romeu Ī http://studiofurniture.com + /diary or + /paint *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
> > I knew it was there (from a previous trip) and got the expected > reaction (!!!). > > > > Cruel???? :-) > >disturbed perhaps Alex, but not cruel. For the decoy or my partner? > > A good overnight trip that one, camped under pines (no tent), woke to the > > sun rising over the mountains. > >camped?...no tent? definitely disturbed. No dew under the pines, no wind either that night so we set up camp by the light of a candle. We'd ended up paddling in the pitch dark to the island. Breakfast in bed, reach out and light the stove for a cup of coffee.... >Just getting into winter down there, eh? Very definitely, a few snow flurries in town last weekend - in a town where it doesn't often snow. Supposed to be 18 degrees today - centigrade!! Alex Alex (Sandy) Ferguson Chemistry Department University of Canterbury New Zealand *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
Hello all, There is one water related bird, I REALLY hate to see. Itīs the most spread duck, here it is called the stock duck. Green - black - grey coloured. I hate them. They are playing with paddlers these awful game "get me - get me - get me --- Quak Quak Quak" EVERYTIME I try to paddle the other side of the waterway, they start to swim on collision course, they hurry up to reach the point of collision and half a metre before the kayak, they make noise and start to fly. Itīs impossible to avoid it. Several years ago a meet the really psycho Psycho Duck. Fly in front of me for over 20 Minutes, sit down waiting, make noise start and fly and so on.... Then I decide to make a stop. I get out of the kayak, eat something and after 15 Min re-enter the kayak. Couldnīt see the duck - HEY! GREAT! Restart to paddle, and after 20m something green-black-grey coloured swim towards me and restarts this game for further 10 Minutes!! Okay, they try to protect their little ducks, but their complete behaviour is "a little bit oversized". Walkers and all these animal-protectors think we (Paddlers) disturb these poor ducks! Itīs just the other way. Maybe itīs the revenge for all the "peking (beejing) duck meals" ?? happy paddling Jochen G. *************************************************************************** PaddleWise Paddling Mailing List - Any opinions or suggestions expressed here are solely those of the writer(s). You must assume the entire responsibility for reliance upon them. All postings copyright the author. Submissions: PaddleWise_at_PaddleWise.net Subscriptions: PaddleWise-request_at_PaddleWise.net Website: http://www.paddlewise.net/ ***************************************************************************
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